I’ve tried on three occasions now to endure—without breaking a sweat and clambering for balance—Pärt’s musical setting of St Patrick’s Breastplate, ‘The Deer’s Cry’. Admittedly, I’ve only conducted the experiment within the auditory confines of a good set of Sennheiser headphones, but even so, it’s only four minutes of music. I’ve tried focusing on how much I despise slavish religious texts, but no joy: within two minutes it floors me.